A new study indicates men may be quicker to get over the past and on with the future than women. The study, conducted as part of the release of the DVD of the romantic comedy, "Crazy, Stupid, Love," suggests that men are much more inclined to get back into the marriage saddle than are women.
]]> The research, out of Britain, looked at 2,000 adults. According to the findings, 47 percent of divorced men who responded said they were ready and eager to marry again. That compares to just 20 percent of the divorced female respondents. Analysts of the study seemed to chalk up female reticence to an apparent heightened sense of "once bitten, twice shy."Adding to the evidence of this difference in the male-female psyches is a finding that more men than women turn to online dating sites to find new mates after divorce. Thirty-one percent of men said they had tried it, compared to 19 percent of women.
Men even indicated that they would not be shy about hiring a dating coach (a topic prompted by the plot line of the movie). Forty-two percent of divorced men said they'd pay for help from a pro to step up their chances of impressing their next possible bride. Only about 20 percent of women said they'd try such a ploy. Of course, finding another mate is not necessarily the goal for either men or women seeking a simple, efficient and low-cost way to end their marriages. Beginning a new life with new possibilities free from the miseries of the past is reason enough.
Source: Daily Mail, "Divorced men are twice as keen to re-marry as divorced women, study finds," Lauren Paxman, Jan. 30, 2012
]]>Well, Alleyne accomplished his mission. But now, 10 years later, it's all coming to an end. His ex-wife, who owns the place, wants to sell and plans to strip it down to conventional décor. We don't know the details of this couple's settlement, but we suspect it was not the result of a no-fault, uncontested divorce. Otherwise, this man's fantasy wouldn't be headed for the dust bin.
]]> How did this all come to happen for this 58-year-old British nightclub DJ? Alleyne says he and his wife separated in 1994. He has lived in the one-bedroom flat alone since then, though his wife has paid the mortgage. Starting about 10 years ago, he says he launched into his redecorating scheme as a way of dealing with his angst.The results are impressive. There is a voice-activated computerized bridge. It allows Alleyne to control lights and sound effects throughout the place. Panels shimmer and beep. There's even a replica of a transporter. Alleyne figures the cost of the job, if he'd hired it out, would have been about $150,000. He did it all himself for a few thousand.
Recently, the courts gave the ex-wife the OK to sell the flat, and she announced the ship décor has got to go. Alleyne admits he's devastated by the call. He says the place reflects his life's work.
Source: Huffington Post, "'Star Trek' Divorce: Fan Forced To Leave Spaceship Digs," Jan. 27, 2012
]]>While the numbers on this divorce are high, it should be noted that there appears to be little acrimonious haggling going on. In some ways it seems to represent the epitome of what should be the objective of a no-fault, uncontested divorce.
]]> Vanessa filed for the divorce last month. She cited the proverbial irreconcilable differences as the cause, some of which reportedly included allegations that Bryant has been unfaithful too many times to be tolerated. (Incidentally, Pennsylvania does not list irreconcilable differences among grounds for divorce and the use of grounds necessarily indicates a fault, not a no-fault, divorce. In a Pennsylvania no-fault divorce, it is simply said that the marriage is irretrievably broken without placing blame on either spouse.)A lot has been made of the fact that the couple got married in 2001 without a prenuptial agreement. But if media reports about how the split is progressing are true, it may be evidence that such an agreement wasn't needed.
Shortly after the divorce became public, the couple issued a joint announcement. They said they have already resolved the tough issues with the help of their attorneys. TMZ quotes sources close to the couple as saying that the transfer of the three estates is part of the finalized deal. And Bryant is on record as saying he will pay alimony in some form. Court documents indicate that legal and physical custody of the couple's two children will be joint.
Source: KTLA, Los Angeles Times, "Kobe Bryant Divorce: Vanessa Gets 3 Newport Mansions," Jan. 20. 2012
]]>With the level of success that both enjoy, chances are this will not be inexpensive as might be expected with an uncontested divorce. Still, the pair issued a statement in which they insist their breakup is amicable. It reads in part, "While we have enjoyed seven very loving, loyal and happy years of marriage, after much soul-searching we have decided to separate. We have had the deepest respect for one another throughout our relationship and continue to love each other very much, but we have grown apart. This is an amicable process and protecting the well-being of our children remains our top priority, especially during this time of transition."
]]> There are reports that Klum came to her decision to divorce because Seal has a violent temper. The online site TMZ says Klum is worried that Seal's lack of control over his rage could be hurting their four children. Klum and the singer have three children together and the fourth was from a previous relationship Klum had with an Italian businessman. Seal adopted the girl, however.In what might be considered an unusual twist for celebrity marriages, there is no suggestion that infidelity has played a role in the split. Klum and Seal were married in a romantic service in 2005 and have renewed their vows every year since then on their anniversary.
"The Daily Mail" of London says the divorce will likely feature a battle over the assets, estimated as being worth many millions.
Source: The Daily Mail, "'It was a long time coming': Heidi Klum ends seven-year marriage over Seal's 'volcanic temper'," Alanah Eriksen, David Gardner, Jan. 23, 2012
]]>In contrast, there is the no-fault, uncontested divorce in which issues are ironed out between the parties without the expensive, time-consuming intervention of lawyers, before the dissolution is submitted to the court for finalization. When the bones of contention are removed, there is no field over which a court battle can be waged and no reason to have to manage the public fallout. Fortunately for those able to file their divorce in Pennsylvania, the courts do NOT require that any of the details of the settlement be made part of the court record. Once real estate and personal property (which is everything that is not real estate) are divided and the divorce thereafter becomes final, neither party can successfully claim any property titled to and/or in the possession of the other. This renders the additional expense of a lawyer-prepared agreement a waste of time and money. Only if something is promised by one party to the other to be given or performed AFTER the divorce is a written agreement necessary.
]]> Such efforts tend not to work anyway, as football great Deion Sanders is coming to learn. He appears to be on track for a messy divorce from his estranged wife Pilar, despite his public claims on radio made earlier this month that the two are still friends.Evidence of the depth of their rift is in court papers that TMZ.com says were filed by Pilar in Texas. In them, she reportedly accuses Sanders of having had many affairs during their 12 years of marriage. The documents also accuse him of being a narcissistic bully who inflicted physical and mental abuse on her.
The news report says she is looking to spike the prenuptial agreement they signed, which would open the door to considerations of alimony. She also is said to be seeking sole custody of the couple's three children.
With that kind of information apparently available in the public record, it's likely to be hard for Sanders to convince the public that there's any feeling of friendship remaining.
Source: USA Today, "Deion Sanders' divorce takes a contentious turn," Tom Weir, Jan. 18, 2012
]]>That certainly seems to be the motive behind "Divorce Party The Musical." This play does not feature simple, no-fault, uncontested divorce as its centerpiece. No, this play tends to look at all the negatives most people associate with the worst divorces. It debuted in Florida recently.
]]> "Divorce Party" is a joint work by Mark Schwartz and Amy Botwinick. They bring to the script and songs a sense of their own experiences with stereotypical divorce horrors. They say the play is an effort to share the humor of divorce that they eventually came to see long after the worst days.The play tells the story of a group of girlfriends who rally to bolster Linda, the lead character, after her recent divorce. Act one starts with the middle-aged Linda balling on the living room floor, all alone, comforted by a pint of Ben & Jerry's.
As things progress, the cast goes through various vignettes that are tied together by parody songs to which the lyrics have been changed. One is a spoof of Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody." In it, Linda's pals seem to be trying to tease her out of her depression by singing, "I see a little woman wallow in self-pity. Suck it up! Suck it up!"
Shots are taken at lawyers and the fights over property. The play also explores the pain of ugly divorces and the reasons why marriages fail. And while the play prompts divorcees with the motto, "Don't get mad, get everything," by the end, Linda has recovered enough sense of self that she is able to triumphantly see a way to get on with her life.
The thought we're left with is how this take on stereotypical divorce reveals the positive value of an uncontested divorce. It might lack drama, but it lacks the pain, too.
Source: AP, Naples News, "New musical seeks to find humor in divorce," Jan. 15, 2012
]]>Facebook and other social media are widely known to be sources that divorce attorneys have started to mine to bolster their arguments during cases. The trend seems to affirm the relative value of no-fault, uncontested divorce in Pennsylvania, which can deliver, at a low-cost, a relatively stress-free dissolution because it requires both parties to agree to terms before papers are filed.
]]> Social media can be detrimental to efforts to obtain a rational, reasonable divorce. There's not only the damage that can be done when one angry spouse goes public with comments about the other. There's also the fact that in today's open media environment, even the more traditional media are beginning to get into the act.As evidence, look at the case of a Boston Globe web developer who tweeted about a young couple's angry row while on a visit to his local Burger King. He also took a photo of the couple and posted that. Mainstream media, including ABC News, picked up the story and spread it around.
Others in the media were rankled by the display. They acknowledged that because the fight was in a public space, the couple had effectively given up their right to privacy. But they questioned whether or not the couple should have had to worry if the apparent disintegration of their relationship was going to be unethically broadcast for the world to see.
It would be nice to think that the social environment hasn't become so open that we can't step back from the precipice of unfettered privacy invasion. In the meantime, it remains possible to retain some semblance of privacy in our divorces by use of the no-fault divorce process.
Source: MSNBC, "7 signs we're living in the post-privacy era," Helen A.S. Popkin, Jan. 4, 2012
]]>It makes sense. January is traditionally the month when decisions on divorce seem to come to a head. There are some who attribute this to a human impulse to get life off to a fresh start in the near year. While divorce cost concerns might create a sticking point for some couples, it doesn't need to be an issue if the divorce can be handled through a simple, no-fault, uncontested divorce.
]]> Attorneys who practice divorce law know other factors come into play too. It's common for couples with close families or with children to wait to formally file for divorce until after the new year in order to avoid tension and confrontation. They observe that holidays can be stressful enough without bringing the question of divorce into the mix.Another thing likely to elevate the discussion of divorce during January is the fact that it is International Child-Centered Divorce Month. Originally started as a national month of awareness, the focus expanded this year to a global scope in order to educate parents about how to reduce the negative impact of divorce on youngsters. So, watch for more in the media on an array of topics related to that.
Here again, simple, no-fault, uncontested divorce may be of particular benefit because of its emphasis on getting property division, child custody and other issues of contention resolved by mutual consent and documented before papers are filed with the courts.
Source: WTVM-TV, "January is busiest time of year for divorce attorneys," Taylor Kinkade, Jan. 3, 2012
]]>But there can be other "participants" in some breakup situations: Pets. While they might not be seen as major players in the family saga, divorce attorneys know that dogs and cats and other loved animals can become bones of contention. Or they might be used as tools of retribution, unless their welfare is considered right along with that of the human beings involved.
]]> One of key reasons to address pet welfare through a settlement is that from a legal standpoint, pets are simply property, living and breathing without question, but still just property. And it is ridiculously expensive to have court determine ownership. According to observers with experience in the area, courts might assign ownership based on who licensed the dog or whoever is named on veterinarian records, even though that really does not prove whether the pet belonged to one party or the other or both during the marriage.If those methods don't work, the court might assign ownership based on a determination of who can provide the best care, depending upon incomes and lifestyles. Naturally, it's best if such issues, whether over the dining room furniture or Fido, never come before the court. It can be easy for an angry spouse to use ownership of a pet as a bargaining chip, even if that spouse really does not want it. When that happens, the danger is that a pet could wind up bearing the brunt of the fury one spouse has for the other, resulting in abuse or even unnecessary euthanasia.
So, what the experts tend to advise is for divorcing couples to commit to treating the issue of pet ownership the same as they would the best interests of children, but keeping in mind that it is a property ownership issue and not one of "custody". This could result in a decision to share possession of and responsibilities for the pet.
Source: Petside.com, "What Happens to Pets After Divorce?," Victoria Schade, Dec. 14, 2011
]]>The couple married in 1999. They have three children together. In addition to his notoriety on the gridiron, Sanders gained some star status through the cable reality show "Deion & Pilar: Prime Time Love."
]]> Sanders registered his intention to divorce Pilar on Dec. 21. According to reports, Pilar didn't know it was coming until she read about it on a gossip Website. Since then, Pilar's attorney has gone public saying that she has been a faithful wife, desires to reconcile and intends to work to achieve that goal.But in recent days, Deiondra Sanders, the 19-year-old daughter of Deion from a previous marriage, has unleashed tweets blasting Pilar as a gold-digger who should have seen the divorce coming for weeks. She accuses Pilar of neglecting her responsibilities as a mother in favor of pursuing her own career.
For his part, Sanders posted a thank you on Facebook expressing gratitude to fans who have stood by him. He also said he has no intention of engaging in a public relations battle over the divorce, though he did say his wife's attorney has a reputation of shaking people down for money.
Meanwhile, the Sanders family reportedly continues to live together under the same roof in a home in Texas. Considering it's a 40,000-square-foot manse on 112 acres of land, with two pools, it's possible they could sustain that arrangement for some time without ever having to see each other.
Source: ABC News, "Pilar Sanders 'Heartbroken' Over Divorce From Deion Sanders; His Daughter Goes on Twitter Rant," Suzan Clarke, Jan. 3, 2012
]]>For most Pennsylvanians considering divorce, the prospect of that kind of settlement is beyond the pale of imagination. Fortunately for them, there is an inexpensive alternative in no-fault, uncontested divorce. By resolving potential points of contention mutually ahead of time, the parties can have their marriage dissolved cheaply and can get on with their lives.
]]> Gibson's divorce was finalized just last week in a Los Angeles court. The estimated payout he is due to make is being called the biggest in Hollywood history. But it isn't an official figure. It's presumed, based on a couple of things.The first presumption is that the Gibson's fortune is based on a 2006 report by the Los Angeles Business Journal. The second is that Gibson and his ex, Robyn, apparently didn't have a prenuptial agreement. If that's true, Robyn should be entitled to whatever proportion California law specifies, in that situation, of all money and assets accumulated during their marriage.
News reports list Gibson's possible assets as including a gross sum of about $600 million from his movie "The Passion of Christ." He is believed to have about $100 million invested in real estate around the world. He's also estimated to have $75 million for film and TV projects that he's produced. In the real world of ordinary couples with ordinary incomes, if they can be sufficiently in control of their emotions to treat the divorce like the business deal it actually is and not waste their time wallowing in hatred and blame, the divorce can take little time and money, and each party can move on in his or her new life.
Source: People, "Mel Gibson's Ex Wife Takes Half His Estimated $850 Million in Divorce Settlement," Ken Lee, Dec. 23, 2011
]]>Two recent studies point out just how connected marriage and the economy are. A joint survey by National Public Radio and the Kaiser Family Foundation reveals that long-term unemployment creates major rifts in marriages. More than 20 percent of Americans who have been without work for a year or more report their intimate relationships have soured. And more than a third say their jobless situation has hurt the health and well-being of their partners.
]]> At the same time, according to a report in the B.E. Journal of Economic Analysis and Policy, for every 1 percent increase in unemployment, the rate of divorce goes down by 1 percent.That might seem counterintuitive, but observers say it makes some sense. When the economy is bad and people are on edge about their futures, partners who know they should be divorced don't take action because they don't feel they have the money. Even in an age when inexpensive, no-fault divorce is widely available, sometimes couples forego the benefit of divorce.
And the potential benefits of no-fault divorce are clear. Stephanie Coontz is a historian at Evergreen State College in Washington state. She says her review of the last century shows a clear pattern. For every decline in the economy, the divorce rate went down and domestic violence went up. But in the 1970s, no-fault divorce started to become available. And she says that in the first five years, divorce rates rose and domestic violence dropped dramatically. So did suicides among married women. Men being murdered by wives also went down.
What this shows is that no-fault, uncontested divorce can serve as a life saving safety valve. And in many places, including Pennsylvania, there are some law practices willing to work out payment plans to ensure that the safety valve continues to be available.
Source: National Public Radio, "Marriage Economy: 'I Couldn't Afford To Get Divorced'," Shankar Vedantam, Dec. 20. 2011
]]>In addition to being lower cost, uncontested divorces aren't held captive by factors beyond the control of the individuals involved, such as politics. Such cannot be said of Pennsylvania's neighbor to the east. No, in at least one area of New Jersey, contested divorces and many other legal actions are currently in lockdown because of a battle over political appointments.
]]> The adversaries are Republican Gov. Chris Christie and state Sen. Ronald Rice, a Democrat from Essex. The struggle is over Christie's nominee for state education commissioner and 11 vacancies in the ranks of judges in Essex. Rice has blocked Christie's selection for the education post, though the appointee is serving as acting commissioner. In retaliation, Christie has refused to appoint any Essex judges, though the two politicos have informally agreed on six of them.In the midst of the stalemate, the courts have started shelving civil and family trials, including contested divorces. Reports say nearly 2,000 matrimony cases are in limbo. And court officials say thousands of more could be added if six judges aren't installed by Feb. 1.
For one couple trying to end a bitter divorce, the stall is described as "agony." The middle-aged couple with children can't afford to live apart, so they live together. Their kids live amid the tension felt between the adults.
As emotionally taxing as divorce can be for the people involved, whether it's contested or not, couples should not have to also endure the vagaries of politics.
Source: The Star-Ledger, "Christie-Rice battle over Essex County judge appointments causes trial backlog," Alexi Friedman, Dec. 18, 2011
]]>Scientists from Cornell University and the University of Central Oklahoma interviewed cohabiting couples from across socio-economic demographic scales. About 67 percent of the respondents listed fear of divorce as the number one reason they are not married. Their specific list of concerns covered everything from social, legal and emotional to economic consequences. Their findings were reported in the journal Family Relations.
]]> The role income plays in the attitudes these couples have of marriage was enlightening. Lower-income women tended to describe marriage as a trap that they could get stuck in if they ever said "I do." They tended to see the responsibilities of marriage as far outweighing the benefits.Slightly higher on the income scale, or what the study describes as working-class couples, showed a tendency to write off the formality of marriage as "just a piece of paper." But they were also twice as likely to express fear that dependency on the two incomes would have the effect of locking them into something they couldn't get out of.
Middle-class couples were the ones most favorable to the notion of getting married. They tended to put cohabitation into the context of part of the natural progression toward marriage.
The study's authors say their hope is that counselors will be able to use the findings to craft specific advice in line with the specific economic status of their clients.
No-fault divorce cannot address some of the deep emotional and psychological issues that may attach to divorce. But for those couples who have the maturity to know that divorce is the right thing for them, a low cost no-faiult divorce may be the way to achieve the objective without fear and without either party being blamed for the failure of the marriage. After all, that is what "no-fault" means.
Source: PsychCentral, "Fear of Divorce Keeps Young Couples from Marrying," Janice Wood, "Dec. 19, 2011
]]>One might think that marriages are casualties of military life at a higher rate than for civilians, but Pennsylvania attorneys with expertise in divorce know that's not necessarily true. And, while it might not be widely known or appreciated, the process of obtaining a no-fault divorce for active military personnel is generally the same as it is for non-military couples.
]]> This may be good news in light of new Defense Department data on military divorce rates: the rate of divorce in 2011 hit a new high of 3.7 percent. That's up just 0.1 percent over the last two years, when the rate held steady at 3.6 percent.The government says the increase comes mainly from the officer ranks. The rate of divorce among the commissioned ranks increased from 1.9 percent in 2010 to 2.1 percent in 2011. For enlisted ranks, the divorce rate held steady at 4.1 percent.
Looked at as a whole, there were 29,400 divorces in 2011 across all branches of the services. The Air Force saw the biggest increase. The Marine Corps saw a decrease.
The key to a successful uncontested, no-fault military divorce in Pennsylvania is an agreement about all the major issues. Whether it involves division of property and/or child custody and visitation matters, if the two sides settle on a plan, appropriate documents can be drafted to make things happen. Finally, in order to qualify for a low-cost, simple, uncontested divorce through a Pennsylvania lawyer and court, at least one of the two parties must either currently reside in Pennsylvania and have done so for at least the last six months; or at least one of them must have Pennsylvania as his or her military home of record, again for at least the last six months.
Source: Marine Corps Times, "Military divorce rate rises slightly in 2011," Andrew Tilghman, Dec. 14, 2011
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