Today's blog post continues its focus on divorce from the perspective of a child, following upon the previous blog's discussion of civility and family candor with further discussion of coping mechanisms that can keep kids on track and balanced during the divorce process.

It is common for kids to voice hopes that their parents' separation is merely temporary and that family unity will be restored. Divorce experts often tell parents to be careful with their response: Acknowledge the desire, but don't kindle false hopes. Divorce means divorce, and children need to understand the permanence of that. Gently, though.

Here are a few additional recommendations from KidsHealth, a child advocacy organization:

• Encourage kids to talk and work through fears, frustrations and concerns verbally; the process itself is therapeutic
• Legitimize their feelings by validating their concerns and offering support
• Skip the details when discussing any aspect of a divorce, and work generally  on being matter-of-fact rather than emotional in front of the kids
• Stay healthy, because parenting skills - listening, being empathetic, recognizing kids' needs, taking charge - can wither in times of physical and mental stress
• Be patient for the children's sake: The factors that brought on the divorce probably didn't surface overnight, and neither will the solutions to post-divorce concerns and needs

And last, guard against isolation and turning inward. Divorce is a process that punishes attempts to go it alone. Seek outlets that make personal sense, whether church, a counselor, a doctor or other resource. Vent outside of the home, to a trusted friend or other party - not to your kids.

Related Resource: www.kidshealth.org "Helping Your Child Through a Divorce"